I was recently asked to tell my Breast Cancer story to a group of young ladies, who are part of Alpha Kappa Alpha at Johnson C. Smith University. One of the questions asked after I gave my presentation was, “Did my faith increase, decrease or stay the same?” I said, “It stayed the same“, but as I thought about it later, I should have answered differently. Read More
This week’s post highlights Carrie’s Touch http://carriestouch.org which is committed to “improving the life of African American women by empowering them to make informed choices about breast cancer Read More
Going to the wig store with Patricia, who claims she is not an extrovert, who always had spare hair at that time, was an adventure! Going anywhere with Patricia is always fun! We have known each other since high school (Little Rock Central). No, we were not part of the Little Rock nine – we aren’t quite that old. Anyway, we met here in Charlotte, after not Read More
As we approach this Thanksgiving, I am reminded of what I had going on six years ago. My locks fell out (due to chemo) just about a week before Thanksgiving. I had already purchased a wig with the help of my BFF Pat (I’ll tell you about that crazy adventure later). I wore the wig a couple of times, but after what happened during those wig wearing adventures, I nixed the wig and decided to go to Lynette’s house (my other BFF) sans wig. I also decided to take our church picture with a bald head.
I guess I need to add a part about what happened to me one of the two times I wore a wig.
We were going on vacation and I was dropped off to check the luggage in while Edward parked the car. When they weighed my bag it was over the limit by 5-6 pounds. The guy on the outside check in asked me to pay the extra or remove some items. I opted to remove some items, but I was weak and struggling to do so. Finally, I got enough out and we zipped the bag up and I went inside and sat down to wait on him to come from parking the car. Now, my husband travels and is one of those folks who eases through the line, whereas, I people watch and talk to folks, etc. When we were checking in for the flight somehow Edward was ahead of me and a family of 5 got between us. He looked back and I signaled for him to go on. When I got to the gate check-in area, the lady said my bag looked like it was too big for the overhead space. I had flown with it before and it fit, but I tried to fit it into the metal sizer outside the gate and it did not fit. I was a bit frustrated but said okay, I would check the bag. I then remembered that I had medical supplies to clear the pic line in the bag. I asked about temperature changes where the bags were stored and was advised to remove any medical supplies. I had to open now another bag and remove items.
I really wanted to rip the wig off and say, “Listen, I have breast cancer, I am undergoing chemotherapy, I am weak and tired give me a break!” But I didn’t. I unpacked the items needed and finally boarded the plane. When I got on board Edward said “Where’s your bag?” I said, “I checked it” and looked out the window.
Maybe I had been through so much that I just figured it was better to have folks see my bald head and think something might be going on with me, rather than have people think everything was just great and not have the strength to even clap my hands.
Back to the story. I didn’t wear my wig to Lynetta’s. I felt comfortable doing so. It was the first time the Thanksgiving celebrants had seen me without hair. I was not apprehensive about not having hair and being there, since it was all friends, family, fellowship and fun! I was thankful that Thanksgiving day, as I continue to be for having friends and being around family – hair or no hair! Because of that, I’m posting that wigless picture taken approximately 6 years ago. Have a Happy Thanksgiving!
Yes, this would be the theme song. For all those who saw their body and it wasn’t how they had envisioned it. But later (approximately 2 years), the perception often changes.
Why is the title of this website “Through a Mirror Dimly?” Well, it is taken from 1st Chronicles 13:12, “For now we see through a glass darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know...” (NKJV)
It says we only see in part, but later we should know more. Hey, there’s hope!
I am glad to finally get the nerve to put this site up. For many people this may be easy, but for me it’s definitely a leap of faith! I hope this is a place of laughter, learning and peace. I want it to provide hope and encouragement for women going through breast cancer (from the lump to the bump) and subsequent body image changes. There’s been enough tears, crying and sadness…and I am sure there will be more, however, let’s get on with life!
Out of this Breast Cancer adventure can come a “higher level of wellness.” It is the realization that you are more than your body, more than what’s happening to you, more than what people can see – more, more…
This is a:
- Positive Space
- Place for someone who has breast cancer, had/ will have mastectomy, chemotherapy, radiation, has had or is thinking about reconstruction and who is concerned about their body image.
- Place for someone:
- Looking for information
- Hopes there is a brighter side to all of this
- Wanting to get information in a group setting without having to leave the house
- Looking for something uplifting
- Not wanting to share in person, but wants to just “lurk” and hear/see the opinions of others
- Looking to contribute every once in a while
- Looking to comment a lot! (You may begin at any time.)
- Giving care to someone who has had breast cancer, chemotherapy, radiation or a mastectomy
- Looking for insight and positivity
- Wants to talk about what the heck is going on with my body and mind!